Delete their Facebook accounts?

N.J. Pastor Tells Church Leaders to Get Off Facebook
Thu, Nov. 18, 2010 Posted: 07:02 AM EDT


A New Jersey pastor is requiring all married church officials to delete their Facebook accounts in the wake of increasing marital troubles in his church.

The Rev. Cedric Miller of Living Word Christian Fellowship Church told The Associated Press that he has been in extended counseling with many couples because of problems posed by Facebook – namely a spouse connecting with an old flame.

"What happens is someone from yesterday surfaces, it leads to conversations and there have been physical meet-ups. The temptation is just too great," he told AP.

Church leaders have until Sunday to permanently sign off Facebook or resign from their positions. Miller also plans to delete his account this weekend.

Miller isn't the only one seeing Christian couples run into trouble because of the popular social networking site.

Texas pastor Kerry Shook of Woodlands Church told The Christian Post earlier this year that he has seen at least one marriage break up over connections made with a past girlfriend or boyfriend on Facebook.

"When you start playing around with that kind of thing, you think it's no big deal. 'They friended me. I'll find out what's going on with them.' [When] you start down that path, you know where that path ends," the megachurch pastor stated then.

At Living Word Christian Fellowship Church, Miller said the misuse of Facebook has posed problems for 20 couples.

Miller plans to warn his entire congregation this weekend about the dangers of Facebook. The mandate to delete one's account, however, won't apply to the congregation.

He told Asbury Park Press that though some may see his action with the church staff as controlling, he's more concerned about saving families and marriages.

Living Word Christian Fellowship Church is more than 20 years old and draws some 1,100 attendees.

Audrey Barrick
Christian Post Reporter

Copyright © 2010 Christianpost.com. All rights reserved.

KOMUNIKASI DALAM PERNIKAHAN

Komunikasi yg efektif akan membantu pasangan membangunkan komunikasi yang efektif.

Komunikasi efektif dan positif terjadi kapan kita mengendalikan fikiran secara positif.

Kita seharusnya belajar untuk memperkayakan kosa kata kerana ia akan memberikan kesan mendalam kepada pendengar.

Saat terpenting untuk menjamin komunikasi yang sihat dalam seharian adalah waktu pagi ketika bangun ungkapan yang diucapakan dan ketika kembali ketemu selepas bekerja.

Beberapa pedoman komunikasi adalah seperti berikut :

1)Berilah salam kepada pasangan setelah berpisah dengan senyuman, kata-kata menyenangkan, humour, pujian atau cerita tentang pengalaman yang menarik dan keberhasialn yang dicapai pada hari itu.

2)Sisihkan waktu unutk transisi setelah pulang kerja untuk menurunkan stress.

3) Jangan sekali-kali mendiskusikan masalah-masalah penting atau serius yang membutuhkan persetujuan bersama saat pasangan anda dalam keadaan yang sangat letuh, sakit ataupun emosional.

4)Sisihkan waktu untuk melakukan sesuatu yang disepakatkan bersama.

5)Sisihkan waktu untuk mengadakan percakapan yang ringan.

6)Jangan menyalahkan pasangan anda. Menahan dahulu segala keluhan dan usulan perubahan sampai waktu khusus untuk berbicara.

7) Bicaralah dengan jelas dan terarah. Hindari berbagai pernyataan yang berlebihan dan terlalu umum

8)Pujilah pasangan anda dengan ucapan yang menyenangkan

9) Jangan membesar-besarkan masalah. Jika Anda benar-benar ingin mengajukan sesuatu kepada pasangan anda, tuliskan inti masalah dan simpan itu untuk saat khusus anda berdua.

10) Jangan berdebat untuk hal-hal yang tidak seharusnya didebatkan.

Dari buku “SO YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED” oleh H. Norman Wright